Saturday, August 25, 2012

Nine months worth of musings.....

  It's been a longer, and somehow shorter time since I last posted anything on this poor old thought repository. No real reason for the lapse other than simple human failing. The months have been some of the most hurried, yet excruciatingly slow in passing on their way than hardly any since I was a very young man. That too was a period of disease, uncertainty, sudden death, loss of friends, gaining of experiences best not to ever have. Those days passed eventually, although they've been duplicated in part on many occasions over the years, but none so intently since those early days until the past three quarter year.
   Within days of posting my last, my beloved Shirley was diagnosed with a fast growing aggressive type cancer for the third time in as many years. This time was worse than the previous two and after much testing an intrusive and intense form of treatment was decided upon that would require nearly two months of daily trips down out of the hills and mountains to the city. As I can no longer drive and she would be unable, we finally settled on using rides from a group set aside by the state to provide drivers for such things and, as I'm not up to the daily trips, our tenant and sometimes personal assistant agreed to accompany her to wheel her from the Radiation Treatment Labs to the Chemotherapy Center. He's in his fifties and somewhat learning disabled. He's become our extra hands and eyes and we've become almost an older brother and sister to him and we ensure he lives comfortably and safely here in our building.
  The trips finally drew to a close after some extra unscheduled extra tests, treatments, and evaluations made necessary by Shirley's reaction to both treatments. Here it is all these months later and now there's a difference of medical professionals on how to proceed. One wants to hold fast at this point and monitor the now very tiny growth; the others want surgery to remove the remainder. The big difference being positioning and whether additional surgeries will do more harm than possible good. It looks now as if we may be resorting to going to the next nearest specialist in this type cancer in Boston, which is about 4 hours drive away. We'll know next week what happens.
   Around the same time as Shirley was diagnosed in December, we lost our sweet little Sooty cat who was only five. She and Slippers contracted an unknown problem about the same time, Slippy is much bigger and I managed to give him antibiotics and he eventually recovered. Sooty was a secretive and quiet little girl and by the time I realized she was ill as well she was very weak and, after three months of nursing, she passed in Shirley's arms. She lay by my feet all night and when Shirley held her to feed her she just purred a tiny sound, then rattled breathing, and was gone. I honestly think she knew the end was near and waited for Shirley, who was so shocked she came rushing to me with Sooty and said something was wrong.
  For any with pets, I think I've finally figured out what it might have been that sickened one and killed the other, even my friend the Veterinarian supports the theory. I was suddenly taken ill the day we were to leave for our son's wedding in Southern Maine and stayed home. The second day I noticed someone had tracked moth repellent chips into our hallway. I confined them to a small area, but I think some may have been tracked in by tenants paying their rent. That may have resulted in some getting into their food or maybe just on them and them licking it off. Our other cat tends to stay up off the floor more and may have avoided the stuff. That would explain the sudden onset and unfamiliar symptoms. The Dr thought perhaps poisoning, but couldn't identify a treatment. He later said that she was likely too sick when I discovered her to help.
   So, she joined the rest of the beloved furry family members in the little cemetery out by the woods. On a brighter note, an old tenant returned and her cat had kittens from an unexpected encounter with her daughter-in-law's cat. She was unable to keep them all, so we took two and she kept one and the other found a home. They're cute, clever, innocent looking, and total little furry demons. We love them to death. Another pair spared a trip to the shelter. Got a big soft spot for furry people.
   Didn't mean this to be a year in review, just happened I guess. Maybe a grandchild will read this one day. we just had a visit in July from Calgary daughter, grandson, and brand new baby girl. Then, this October we have a little boy due here in Maine. Didn't realize the scope of it all until writing to a friend how one granddaughter is soon off to college, another soon to complete high school, two actually. Then ranging all the way to the currently pregnant daughter-in-law. Amazing how all the little pieces eventually make a whole tapestry of our lives before we realize it's happened. Another big change may or may not happen in that we may let go of this old apartment building and move ourselves, cats, and our helper tenant into a different place that would more easily facilitate my getting out and about. Getting to the point of being nearly home-bound now. Still a good life, but a little restricted. Finding the right place and leaving our little pet cemetery are stumbling blocks right now. Time will tell, maybe later on, maybe not. Hard to leave after nearly twenty years, it being the longest I've ever lived in one place in my 66+ years. Ah well, mayhaps change is good.  

  So, all in all, I guess I should move my year-end review up a few months from autumn to now, as I don't really see how much more can fit in, other than grandson, changing seasons, changing life, and all constant as it has been forever. Life is still sweet. Take care.

1 comment:

deanna said...

What a time you and Shirley have been through. So sorry about your kitty who died. Those kittens are nearly as adorable-looking as your grandbaby. I'll continue praying for you and Shirley and hoping for the best in your next chapters.